Tuesday, May 24, 2011

More Than I Can Chew-----As Usual.

You know when you cram too much (the food should be dry, like crackers) into your mouth, then someone asks you a question, and you open your mouth to reply, and you spray them with crumbs?  Yes, you can pretend I am 7, because clearly, no adult would dare actually do this FOR REAL.  (I don't believe me either.  The mental picture is more where I was going.  And, if you are still reading this, clearly you love me despite my overwhelming flaws.)

Anyways-I am trying to say I regularly bite off more than I can chew.

I do too much. I get this.  I get this so well, I TYPE about it too much.  That's how connected to this illness I am.  Completely immersed in it. I can hardly defend it.  Hardly.

I volunteered way back in fall, before I learned that word, "NO", to do the yearbooks for both kids.  Which meant that I had to make sure I got photos of all the fabulous fun ALL YEAR.  Now, I get to put it all into an online scrapbook for each parent to decide to buy. I figured, back in September, this was an easy job.  Certainly easier than Art Docent, who has to KNOW stuff, share that knowledge, and be reliable certain days. Harder than Book Order Person, but someone I otherwise like STOLE that job from under me.

But, I am asking one person from each class to edit it for me.  Baby steps...

Then, got roped into roped myself into another crazy pile of crap.  Let me set the stage....

A few parents show up to review Family Life Education materials (read: Sex-ed)
the conversation turns to hygiene, of which our children all seem to be clueless. I, very innocently say, "Do you all ever hand out goodie bags, like filled with deodorant?"  A teacher says, "yes, we used to, but it's just not in the budget". 
Well, there are few smells worse than 20-something pubescent children right after PE, so I say, "I will provide it!"  One teacher exclaims, with what only can be described as complete and utter adulation, "Really?????? That would be GREAT!!!!".  So, I say, how many kids?


Yep, I have to buy 120 deodorants. 

And, the sick freak that I am, I am envisioning 130 bags (what if the count was off????) filled with deodorant, toothpaste, toothbrushes, lotion, shampoo.  All neatly packed into a cellophane bag.  Red ribbons for girls, Blue for boys.  By Tuesday.

Now I just have to figure out how to get dental appointments for the kids, so I can then figure out how to lift a bunch of samples.

And, that is not even the point of the blog.  Sick, I tell you. Sick, sick, sick.

The POINT IS.....I am a Girl Scout Leader. Did you roll your eyes?  It's okay, everyone else does when I tell them.  You are in good company.

But, no matter how much it bugs to try to come up with activities for 13 Daisies and Brownies, no matter how many freakish people I have to tolerate at the monthly meetings (It's like a cult over there, I swear!), I LOVE it.  When my husband pushes me to downsize my obligations, I can't bear to drop the girls. 
We have such an amazing group.  They all love each other so much.  They truly get the sisterhood of it.  And, I get to do awesome things like take them to a garden, where they willingly spend 45 minutes looking at flowers, and sketching their favorites.  It was magical. And, when I ask Princess if she wants to continue next year, she says yes.  Then, I ask, "Do you want me to be the leader still?"  She looks at me through her ginormous eyelashes, and says, "Yes, Mama.  Of Course!" My heart melts, and I finish putting out the paper, Dues jar, and pencils.

Sign me up!


  1. I will come over, with a bottle of wine, and help you assemble these bags. Pinkie swear. Just tell me when.

  2. Also, my word verification was "crabs." It's a sign and I think we should put condoms in the bags as well. We can even color coordinate them with the ribbons.

  3. Even better-I decided to NOT bag them-way to say no, right? Oh, and I was SPECIFICALLY told NO WAY on the condoms. Party poopers.