Friday, May 6, 2011

Why am I here?

Well.  Ahem.

I have not been real honest with you.  I think it is time I came clean.

I don't blog for you.

I am a fairly selfish person, and I don't want to shell out more $20 co-pays than necessary, so I thought that blogging would give me an outlet that I needed to get through some of this crap I got goin' on.  Well, okay, maybe I thought I could also help others going through the same blah blah blah.
So, I enjoy writing-I like to be funny (AND, the center of attention), and I need extra therapy-hence, blog.


Also, I read somewhere that I was going to be limited to 9 therapy sessions by my insurance, unless my therapist requested more. So, I thought I better start learning how to vent before she cuts the cord.  I told her last week about my brilliant plan. And here comes the good news.  And bad news.  Same sentence, by the way:
Her: Why would they cut you off?
Me: Umm, 'cause they only give me 9 sessions, unless I need more
Her: Oh no!  With certain diagnoses, they can't cut people off! It's protected by law. (cue happily surprised look on my face).  Yes, they cover it for bigger things like, oh, let's see, Bi-polar disorder, schizophrenia,, things like that, and in your case, severe depression (cue glazed over look in my eyes).
Me: (In my brain) SEVERE?  REALLY? You had to say that?  Great, something else to obsess about. Because I was just getting used to the idea to depression at all.  Now, it's severe.
Me: (Out of my mouth )Oh, great!

So, good news (covered therapy FOREVER, holla!) bad news (SEVERE DEPRESSION).  What a roller coaster.

But, I had already begun the blogging, and I have a whole 2 official followers, so I'm in it to win it.  Or something like that.  My loss, your gain, right?

UPDATE: I talked to my therapist about her rotten label. Turns out, she did NOT say "severe".  (phew!)  She said "Major". (Gulp).  I must have looked alarmed, because she explained what that really meant, and it was about insurance billing, not stereotypes in my head (hey, how does she know that?).  Then, she said, "and, your case is mild". To which I said, with hardly any sarcasm at all, "Oh! Mild major depression. Phew! Glad ya clarified!"  Still love her, though.

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